The plight of the red-winged blackbird
Those red and yellow stripes aren’t peathers they’re pucking war medals
Never thought I’d be a step junkie yet here we are...
No! Actually, here we are. No! Over HERE! *waves*
And I thought I was windy
Walking into the wind today I felt all wide-eyed and chiseled but when I turned around my face got all pointy in front of me and it started whistling
I had gnats for breakfast, how ’bout you?
Little fuckers broke my fast*
Suspension of disbelief is not just for swallowing the printed word
It also comes in handy at dawn on an April snow day when I fall three times during a very short conversation and neither of us seem to notice
You know what happens when you say you don’t believe in Fairies, right?
Well guess what? I don’t believe in calories. It’s my new weight loss strategy
Played some rage-tennis last night
The wall didn’t stand a chance
Blog titles I came up with when I couldn’t come up with blog titles
I’m never sure what to think when people say the best thing about my blogs are their titles. It’s like saying the best thing about a restaurant is its menu
Do you really want to know what’s wrong?
This isn’t going to be funny
I overthink, therefore I overam
Or would that be underam?
“I’m not a cat” is what a cat would say
omg did you see that video? I think the judge is Mr. Rogers
Not to be dramatic, but...
I feel a stress-induced zit coming on and it’s all because of excessive worry re my cookie glitch
I have bangs now like Bette Davis as Charlotte
I did it because of winter hats. Thought a little fringe would be cute, you know, and it is pretty cute in an aged child sort of way
How to February
It’s a good time to introduce your new imaginary friends to your posse
5 Reasons I Hate Lists
And that might be my finest headline ever
Self-awareness is not my fort
I was describing a difficult character. I said she had a sketchy past, drank too much, and was dodgy in general. Remind you of anyone?
I’m awake. Are you awake?
Spoke with a friend yesterday. She said pacing is the only exercise she gets these days
Just a few more adjustments to the English language if you will
If people can be hard-of-hearing they should be able to be hard of other things too, you know, like hard-of-sense
